We will all face loneliness. However, isolation is a choice, and it’s a bad one.
And, yes, we all need some “alone time” with just us and Jesus. This isn’t about that.
Let’s deal with the hard truth about isolation.
Isolation isn’t an isolated event. It hurts those we should be doing life with, and everyone misses out.
How do we know if we are living in isolation? Isolation is often marked by several things:
- Lies from the enemy. It’s just what he does!
- Abuse and excess. We tend towards extremes when no one is around to hold us accountable.
- Victim status. It is easy to justify this status when we have isolated ourselves from the perspective others can bring.
- Extreme blame. The fault has little (or nothing) to do with us. “It’s all their fault.”
- Normalization. This is when we have allowed “Victim” instead of “Victor” to become our identity.
Give Psalm 25:16-22 a read. David felt like we have all felt, maybe how we do right now. Understand that David was the King! He had servants, he was married, had lots of kids, had officers and an army of men including a group known as David’s Mighty Warriors (also known as David’s Mighty Men or the Gibborim; Hebrew: הַגִּבֹּרִ֛ים ha-Gibbōrîm) are a group of 37 men in the Hebrew Bible who fought with King David and are identified in 2 Samuel 23:8–38.
There was no good reason for David to be lonely, let alone in isolation.
What we know is after this Psalm was written, David isolated himself and this contributed in no small way to his multiple sins of lies, adultery and murder in his selfish pursuit of Bathsheba. See 2 Samuel 11 – 12 for this sordid story.
We are never truly isolated. The enemy is right there to keep us company.
However, he will rarely reveal himself. Instead, he will whisper subtle half-truths and outright lies about God, you, others and your situation, that will serve to further isolate and discourage.
Discouragement unchecked leads to disillusionment and dissolution leads to desperation and desperation to deadly choices.
Is there hope for those in the dark of seclusion? YES!
Be on the lookout for the next post as we explore the steps to overcoming and then avoiding the trap of isolation.
Want to get a head-start on some great advice concerning loneliness and leadership? Check out https://careynieuwhof.com/overcoming-the-new-leadership-epidemic-isolation-and-loneliness/